understanding women-every man's issue

For every male...and female??? who has been given a hard time by a female 

          "and from the rib of man did God create woman". Yeah, just one of God's numerous wonders. so why do men have such hard times understanding women? Women are like creatures on display for the world to see. We do not understand them so we attempt to watch their behavioural patterns to see if we can figure them out. If your'e a guy and you think this method works...YOU LIE.. Women rarely mean what they say. They always find ways to mask what they mean under the cover of the opposite and expect you to figure it out. Women expect you to work hard for them. Women expect you to treat them right. Even if they pretend to be all independent and capable, what they really want is a man who spends on them and this is not some stupid cliché. Women want to be made to feel beautiful. Women expect to be always right even if they know there not. Women like words first and looks next. Women want to dump not to be dumped. No matter how much a female seems to like flings and unattached'open relationships, deep inside lurks a girl who wants to be wanted by a man. And even though they lie and lie about their non-believe in the existence of prince charming and love, they all want to believe it. Women hate to face reality. when women are sad, they want everyone around to go into the deep blue funk there submerged in.......women women women...to be continued

You know you love me

xoxo..rUdE gIrL:P

zzaap...ure not getting anywhere

          Mum and dad are getting a divorce, I'm still in the middle stages of getting over my latest emotional screw-up, my best friends hate each other and I'm stuck with the duty of making them feel just as important as the other. The source of my heartbreak seems to have clearly moved on leaving me desperate to do the same just as quickly, My "A's" are becoming "A-'s". As I always do, I sit down, analyse the situation and plan the method of execution of the solution. 
          I'l make my mum and dad remember the reason they fell in love in the first place. I'l sit my friends down and tell them how much they are hurting me by being douche bags and expecting me to be the only mature one. I'l try to be more friendly towards my screw-up partner so hopefully, the little strings will become friendship strings. I'l cut down my fun time and solve my academic crisis. I mean, I have it all under control, I'm super-female in the making. I've been doing this since I could reason, this'l be so easy.
          A month later: The parent trap seems to be succeeding. My dad and mum seem so comfortable with each other now. There's no more hurtful words and screams. My friends are on sync. My studies rock. My screw-up and I are fast becoming friends. See? I knew I could solve it. I'm the shit, no doubt about that. I was in for a shocker:
          My parents tell me they are still getting a divorce, but thanks to me, they are friends. My besties I worked so hard for cook up a scandal about me. My screw-up just kissed a girl in front of me and it hurt because he didn't have enough respect to do it when I wasn't in sight. The only consolation I have is my books that are still going fine now. I was standing so unprepared when it hit me. It hit me so hard I burst into tears: I WAS A FAILURE. I COULD NOT SOLVE MY PROBLEMS. I WAS A SCREW-UP.
          It took me a big mistake to learn this, but I did. You can't solve all your problems. The best you can do is hope you have tried your best and watch the rest happen. \there's a good chance it'l be messed up, but you only make it worse when you try to stop it. It's like those "final destination" movies where you try to stop death and end up failing woefully where the only place you have time to ponder on what went wrong is six feet under where you'l end up either way. 
          I was living in a bubble. For too long ,I wallowed in self denial. I'm coming clean now. Yes, my parents are getting divorced. Yes I'm not completely over him even if he seems to be over me and the thought hurts that I'm the only one suffering. Yes, my besties are at loggerheads and want me to be there for em both, I'l try to be as much as I can. My books-well that's pretty self explanatory. I WILL FACE REALITY AND STOP LIVING A LIE.
          I'm awake. I cannot believe I just dreamt, but it's still reality. My parents are still clawing at each other, my besties still hate each other, I still miss my screw-up and (oh I hate to say this)-I still have an "A-". I'l be fine, I know and tell myself. I'l take it slow, one day at a time...or maybe not??? (old habits die hard o)
                                                  You know you love me
                                                     xoxo...rUdE gIrL
          

Gravity

  I love this song, so I thought sharing it would be a good idea...hope it is..                
         Gravity-Sara Bareilles
Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long
No matter what I still do
Still feel you here till the moment I'm gone
You hold me without touch
You keep me without chains
I never wanted anything so much
Than to drown in your love and in your rage


Set me free
Let me be
I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity
Here I am
And I'l stand
So tall, just the way I'm supposed to be
But you're unto me
All over me


You loved me because I'm fragile
And I thought that I was strong
But you touch me for a little while
And all my fragile strength is gone


Set me free
Let me be
I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity
Here I am
And I'l stand
So tall just the way I'm supposed to be
But you're unto me
And all over me


I live here on my knees as I
Try to make you see that you're
Everything you think I need
Here on the ground
But you're neither friend nor foe though I
Can't seem to let you go
The one thing you have to know
Is that you're
keeping me down low.
yeah yeah yeah yeah


You're onto me and on to me and all over
Something always brings me back to you
It never takes too long.


          You know you love me
                 xoxo-rUdE gIrL:P

          Ok  bloggers, rude missus is attempting at dabbling with poetry. It was composed in the space of 15 minutes and it's the very first poem I actually feel like I wrote with all my senses alert. I have not edited anything in it. I just wrote the words out of my head like BAM. It's called waking up to reality. Hope the title fits the poem or at least that you find it good. Here goes:

          What was once a steady pulse, quickens

          at the mere sight of him

          Drinking in every familiar feature

          Like a picture committed to memory

          So close, yet so untouchable

          The clock ticks, ever so steadily

          I reach out, to lay it all down, rid myself of the pain of wanting

          Yet, again I check myself and withdraw back to safety

          It's over, get on with your life, I repeat like a litany in my head

          Yet I cannot bring myself to face the cold numbing truth that we are now a     past tense

          Fool me once, shame on you

          Fool me twice, shame on me

          Can I risk being the fool again?

          Even when it seems all hope is gone

          Or shall I bare it all and risk another chance at happiness

          He's smiling oh I remember it all like the stab of a knife

          I want to tell myself it is all an act

          That he wants me as much as I want him

           Yet like a too familiar, cold and unfeeling friend

          Reality sets in-he's over it, over me

          I have no choice, so I back my mask on

         The fantasy is over, it's time to move on.

                                  You know you love me   

                                       xoxo...rUdE gIrL:P

          

       

Still on words...Friendship...don't I looove that word

          Still practicing how to write daily and following the 12.5 rules of writing, I thought about a lot of my friends and decided to write about them. You have to pardon me because I'm writing directly from my brain and heart so there might be some teeny-weeny writing flaws innit. See I love friends. The concept of the word friendship is veree appealing to me. To me, friends portray a person of group of people that have your back, for a time in your life(sorry, not a fan of true and forever-lasting friendship). They test your limits and encourage you. They poke fun at you yet protect you when you're truly stung and...some of them give the best advice ever(even though I never listen half the time and the other half involves carrying out the advise the wrongest way possible). Their like a mini family you know that you can't fight with forever. They give you a sense of belonging somewhere because no one can stand the feeling of loneliness (even losers have other losers as friends and the the coldest people have other people they can relate to.see high school bitches.lol.no offence meant, but do they really have any real friends?). 

        October 05. I just resumed this annoying but really good looking school in some laid back village in one of the most boring states(boring even to boring me) which happens to be my home state(double problems..how could my parents do this to me?). I'm really pissed off cuz some  douche came over and started messing with me cuz I was new. Seriously? this is 9ja(Nigeria) not some phony high school in an hollywood studio. New students aren't as pathetic as they make us seem. In retrospect, our situation is worse because we have no idea who and what people are like so end up making the totally wrong choices and saying the wrong things for the first few weeks. Here I saw and encountered a lot of "friend specimen"

          Friend Specimen 1: Most of these friend types tend to be female. They are usually good people inside, but have irritating ways of showing it. They are awfully over-familiar with people and always find a mysterious way of being related to new people. They are very nice to people they like even if those people hate the sight of them or could not care less about them. They are veree, I repeat vereee nasty to people they do not like. They never take advise even if it is for their good. Simply put, they are "special".lol. anybody's face pop-up in your mind..or maybe it;s YOUR FACE. Don't take me wrong here. They are good people, just a little bit more  damaged than we all are aren't we?..

          Friend Specimen 2: They LIE LIE and LIE some more. Funny thing is, we all have a bit of this in us. A lot of us do it to belong, but the truth is a lot of our friends would accept us as we are without having to tell lies ugly, hot, sexy, beautiful, neurotic and all. After a while, like in all cases, our the lies catch up with them and they face what led them to lying in the first place-FEAR OF NO FRIENDS. Now in a hollywood movie, he/she(in most cases she) would realize she has been hurting the few real friends she has and would feel remorseful. Then the abandoned friends would realize she has learnt her lessons and forgive her cuz "that's what friends do". Somehow, the fake friends she lied to end up losing. Reality check: that is a LIE. Now this is what real life is like: if the lies get excessive and she has no proof, everyone will know he/she is a LIAR and start to avoid making conversation with them. Soon, the fake friends start to put together a plan to find out the truth and of course they do. Final verdict; THEIR SCREWED. They have ha d no time to make real friends in the course of their lying so, THEY BECOME FRIENDLESS which is what they started lying for in the first place. How ironical is that? 

          Friend Specimen 3: also called fair-weather friends. That's pretty  self explanatory. They only stay when you got good things going for you. uh-hun.

          Friend Specimen 4: They love you tails and fangs and all. If you're being stupid, they tell you. They jack you back to reality and you love them just as much as they love you. You laugh and cry together. You can't stand arguing with them for long. You tend to be very similar or very different from them, but it only makes it more fun. Did I mention they give great advise?..oh yeah I did, but I'm saying it again. Friends are the second best gift(1. family) one can ever have. Other people come and go, but friends stay (even if they aren't the same people) and help you through it all. I LOVE FRIENDSHIP.

This is dedicated to all everyone in see and who sees me as real, valued and trusted friend.

You know you love me

xoxo...rUdE gIrL. 

Words as you see them.......

          12.5 rules of writing..it said. Rule 8: weed, do the dishes, take a walk..and write about it, nothing is insignificant to write about. Rule 12.5: stop looking at the poster..WRITE SOMETHING. A lot of things have crossed my mind as too personal, too stupid, or not worth wasting time to write about, but today, I'm going to give it a try. All I have to do is write, so here goes: (I hope you find it good or at least passable enough)

          Life is a word, a simple word. So are love, hate, trust and friendship.Why then are these the hardest words to define in life? Why are they the cause of so much complexity and controversy amongst ourselves?  Why are they words that have no perfect definition like school or house? I would define those words as "what you want them to mean for you, good or bad." There's no such thing as a true friend forever, and I'm not some sadist saying this. Humans by nature, change. The true friend of your teenage years is different from the friend you know now that you're mature adults. Nor is your kindergarten bff the same person now that you're both 17 and hot, so why complain when she betrays you or get surprised when you realize you can and want to betray her?  It'l hurt depending on what side of the deal we get, but then we do what we do best...GET OVER IT.. that's why time is the greatest healer there is and will ever be. We get up, dust our asses and move on to find the next person who will be that "true friend" for a while because man cannot survive as an island does.(permit the wrong phrasing.lol). As ironical as the previous statement sounds, I'm writing this alone in a warm room and realizing that when it all boils down, we are alone. We come to this world alone and we die alone. Nobody truly understands what and how we feel. Sure, they can relate to us and predict some actions, they know not the essence of our humanity.

          Trust has always, is still, and will continue to be broken, even to ourselves. A few months ago, I was a radically different person from who I am now. I was the ultimate obedient daughter who would never dream of hurting her parents or shocking them with her actions. I was the trusted "good-child" who would never let a boy into the picture and cause her to disobey some of her mums rules till mum deemed it fit to let her. I  managed to keep that up till 16. Then as always in life, I broke the rules all at once. It felt good to do so, but the rule following, mistake hating part rebelled. the effect was horrible until someone I value greatly as a friend told me  "If you live life by all the rules and be a planner all the time, trying not to make mistakes and have regrets, you end up making the biggest mistake and having the biggest regret because in planning for the end, you will have missed out the  beginning and middle." It stung, but it was true. For some funny reason, my pen has stilled.

                          "Life should be as we see it, not as others define it for us"

                                              You know you love me...

                                                   rUdE gIrL....XXX

             

It's Complicated...

I'm in a VERY irritated mood right now..iv got the worst assignment ever. Don't get me wrong, its not a HARD assignment, its DUE TOMORROW and I've written only two paragraphs out of five or more...those two took me about 3 hours to get right and I'm afraid I'l cancel and start over. MSCHEEEW...i just wanted to post something so my blog wouldn't be empty. ..xxx...i have a veery interesting topic coming on...ciao..always rude...Rude-girl:P